Arthur of the Little Round Table - a comedy by Norman Weinstein about antiques and fanatics



Here's an opportunity to enter the peculiar world of antiques dealers, collectors and associated oddities.

DILLSWORTH. Remember, Honeycutt, first you crawl, then you walk. And you might just take a look at The Hidden Treasures of Arts and Crafts by Malcolm Sanderson. (Looks at PENNY and smiles knowingly at her.) Once you've learned to walk, Harriet and I might discuss our wants with you, including, of course . . .

ARTHUR. The mystery piece?

DILLSWORTH. Right.

CANNON. You be careful with them bells. You hear me, Honeycutt?

(All leave, except for PENNY and ARTHUR. He furiously smacks his right fist into his left hand.)

ARTHUR. Two days in business and my reputation's ruined! I'll get that dirty sonofabitch! I'll get Willowtree! And one of these days I'll put Dillsworth in his place, too! Arrogant bastard!

PENNY. He seemed pretty decent to me, considering how angry he was, and knowledgeable.

ARTHUR. Decent? You call that sonofabitch decent! He was drooling over you!

PENNY. I didn't notice. Besides, why didn't you at least tell him where you got that tabouret?

ARTHUR. Dealers aren't supposed to say where things come from. It's a matter of honor.

PENNY. I hope heredity's exaggerated. My poor children!

ARTHUR. I'll find Willowtree! I'll show Dillsworth and Vanderhorst just what I'm made of. Believe me, Penny, I'm not washed up, no way! You'll see!

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